The Power of Gratitude
Written by Kendall Bergman
Do you recall the blog I wrote on the practice of resilience a few months ago? You can refresh your memory by clicking here. I’m taken with the idea that gratitude and resilience are directly related one to another and will unpack that a bit here.
For those of you who know me, you know I’m not big into sports. You also know I really enjoy strength training. Back in September when I posted the blog on resilience, I suggested that resilience is similar to strength training. If you work your back and shoulders on Tuesday, for instance, it’s a bad idea to exercise those muscles again on Wednesday, Thursday or Friday. You’ve actually torn some of the muscles in your back and shoulders on Tuesday and you need to rest and nourish those muscles to prevent injury. When you return the following Tuesday and focus on your back and shoulders again, you’ll notice that you are stronger and have increased capacity.
This is exactly how resilience works. In brief, resilience is the ability to bounce back after an adverse event. When the injury, hurt, mistake, grief, failure, incident happens, it is imperative to name it and take time to rest and nourish. As you adopt this new way of becoming aware, you will notice that when that next injury, hurt, mistake, adverse event occurs, resilience has become a tool and resource you can actively draw upon. The way toward increased strength and capacity is not around the pain, but proper rest and nourishment through the pain.
You may be asking yourself, “How is gratitude related to resilience?” I have a few ideas about that.
Gratitude is directly related to grace and graciousness and the power of gratitude is discovered in an active practice. Gratitude is present no matter your circumstances. If you’ve recently lost a job, gone through a painful divorce or experienced the death of a loved one, you know that grief can be overwhelming. And yet, the ability to express gratitude is no less present.
In 2003, I moved from Dallas to Seattle to attend seminary. I was in my mid-30’s and had lived in Dallas my entire life. After moving, I quickly realized I liked nature...a lot. Dallas isn’t really known for its beautiful green spaces. The Pacific Northwest, on the other hand, is spectacular. I used to tell people you could spit on the ground and something beautiful would have sprouted by the next morning. There is something for everyone...mountains, beaches, lakes...and lots of rain.
I also realized that I enjoyed hiking. In Texas, we go for walks...sometimes long and sometimes short, but always a walk. In Seattle, they hike!
After living there for about a year, I had been walking the massive hills in the city on a daily basis and was ready to try something more challenging. A friend, Mandy, invited me to hike Mount Si with her. I was nervous. Mount Si is 4 miles up (pretty vertical) and 4 miles back down. Mandy was a good 10 years younger and generally more active than me. Even so, she assured me I would be fine. So we did it.
Throughout the hike, Mandy and I shared a lot about our respective families and lives, how each of our relationships with God were changing and the purpose of hiking. I was discovering that hiking isn’t so much about the rigor of strength training, endurance of running or even flexibility of, say, yoga. Hiking isn’t solely about the physicality of the activity. Hiking is really about the entire experience. Hiking is about stopping and smelling the roses, taking an unnecessary switchback for enjoyment and jaw dropping view and allowing overwhelm at God’s creation.
Because I had been doing regular walks in the city, working with weights at the gym and gone on a few less challenging hikes, my body responded pretty well. Mandy was my trail guide and reminded me that I’d likely need to soak in a hot bath and rest my body the next day. Is this ringing a bell? Does this sound familiar? She was teaching me about resilience.
Throughout that hike, I remember feeling gratitude...I was grateful for the experience. Grateful that my body was able to move and function. Grateful for God’s infinite creativeness and the gift of nature in all it’s radiant splendor. I was grateful for Mandy. I was grateful to know and trust that over time my body would bounce back. It’s only in hindsight that I clearly see the symbiotic relationship that resilience and gratitude share. They both require awareness, attention and practice. They both offer healing and transformation. They dance with each other and play with one another. They invite us to self-care and even deeper self-compassion.
During this Thanksgiving week, I invite you to hit the trail...or the sidewalk in your neighborhood…or the treadmill in your bedroom…and remember that the power of gratitude is about its practice and being in the moment. So…take a beat to reflect, realize your own resilience and discover your gratitude practice in a way that is meaningful for you.